


Gie Me Ae Spark o' Nature's Fire

by april_rainer (tom_bedlam)



Category: Shetland (TV)
Genre: F/M, Minor Character Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-18
Updated: 2017-12-18
Packaged: 2019-02-16 13:53:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13055298
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tom_bedlam/pseuds/april_rainer
Summary: Cassie grows up, much to the stress and delight of Jimmy Perez and Duncan Hunter, ill-assorted co-parents.





	Gie Me Ae Spark o' Nature's Fire

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Laekin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laekin/gifts).



> First of all, thanks to Laekin for such an excellent prompt -- the relationship between Duncan and Jimmy was one of my favourite parts of this show, and I absolutely loved trying to flesh it out and understand it better, while still keeping true to the canon characterization.
> 
> Since I am not from Shetland, or indeed even Scottish, I apologize in advance for any misused Scots or Shetlandic. Also for any errors in geography, flora, fauna, etc.
> 
> The title is from Robert Burns' "Epistle To J. Lapraik, An Old Scottish Bard".

**Samhain, 2002**

“Right,” Fran said, gripping Cassie’s hand tightly as they waited to get off the plane.  “Twenty more minutes and we can stop moving.”  Of the other passengers, Jimmy identified most as tourists, three clumps and one young woman with headphones and an MP3 player tucked in her pocket, but looking around as eagerly as the American group shouting at each other at the front of the plane.  Two boys, visiting from uni by the look of it, were shrugging on rucksacks and nodding at one another with the familiarity of people who weren’t exactly friends, but who had been in school together for so long, they couldn’t not know each other.  “For a week anyway,” she said with a sideways smile at Jimmy.  
  
The Americans cleared out, and the locals, and the backpackers, and the Glaswegians, and the solitary tourist, until Fran let herself be tugged to front door while Jimmy gathered his bag and Cassie’s purple backpack.  
  
“Duncan!” Cassie shrieked, as she ran toward the terminal to be gathered up by a short island-faced man with laugh lines and a receding hairline.  
  
“Hi, Duncan,” Fran said stiffly.  “This is Jimmy.”  
  
“The new boyfriend?  Pleased to meet you,” Duncan said, shifting Cassie to his hip to hold out a hand with an easy smile.  “We’re so pleased you could make it up for Cassie's birthday this year!  You've got to come for Up Helly Aa some time.  It’s quite a site, you know.”  
  
“Aye,” Jimmy said, as if he’d never been up to Lerwick for Up Helly Aa in his life, shaking hands politely.  Duncan had a handshake like salesman, the kind that wanted you to think it trustworthy.  The line between Fran’s eyebrows, that if they were in private Jimmy would stroke with his thumb until she smiled at him, was deep and stressed, and he couldn’t make himself smile back at Duncan Hunter.  
  
“We’d best get our bags,” Fran said.  
  
“Well, princess?” Duncan asked, smile still in his voice as he gave Cassie a little bounce on his hip.  Jimmy gritted his teeth and went to help Fran with the bags, reminding himself that it didn’t matter how much he already loved Cassie, Duncan had some right to love her too.  He couldn’t help being a little jealous at how easily Cassie let Duncan carry her; she was an independent little puss, and it had been almost a year before she’d stop crying when Fran handed her to him, and they saw each other every day.  “Are you excited for your second birthday?” Duncan asked, still focused on Cassie.  
  
“Yeah!  I got a Barbie an’ a game an’ a Teddy an’ a BOAT!”  
  
“All these things!  What else could you possibly want?”  
  
“Uuuuuuhm another Barbie?” Cassie gave a little wiggle.  
  
“We’ll have to see what we can do, then.”  Duncan let Cassie slide to the floor and run to Fran to babble about the plane and her Barbies and her boat.  
  
Jimmy pulled their suitcase from the belt and habitually did a bag count: black bag, brown duffle, Fran’s purse, Cassie’s backpack, small child, all check.  He touched Fran’s hip lightly to let her know that they were good to go before remembering, and wondering if she would rather he stopped.  But Fran turned her smile on him, the frown line all smoothed out, and murmured, “Thanks, love.”  
  
Turning back to Duncan and Cassie, Fran added, “When are your parents expecting us, Duncan?”  
  
“As soon as we can get there,” Duncan said, with half a frown of his own, sliding smoothly into a smile.  Jimmy wondered if the man was always smiling, with some dislike.  “Ma’s been cooking since yesterday to make sure our Cass has everything she could possibly wish for.”  
  
“Mince pies?  Are there mince pies?”  
  
“There are, my princess, and you shall have as many as your heart desires.”  
  
“One,” Fran said, with a slight frown.  “You can have one, to please your grandmother.”  
  
“So what is it you do?” Duncan asked, as they settled into his car, Cassie and Fran in the back, Jimmy in the front on the strength of a jerk of Fran’s head.  
  
“Daddy’s a policeman!” Cassie exclaimed from where Fran was buckling her in.  “He catches bad men!”  
  
Over the seatbelt, Fran and Jimmy’s eyes met for a frozen moment — Cassie sometimes called him Daddy and sometimes Jimmy, and they had both been careful to let her make up her own mind as to where Jimmy was going to fit into his life.  They hadn’t thought to discuss what Duncan might think of that.  
  
The pause was barely there, then Duncan we coming back with, “Is he now?  I’ll have to be on my best behaviour, won’t I?”  
  
When Jimmy looked back over at him, Duncan was still smiling, and in that moment of carelessness for Cassie’s sake, Jimmy couldn’t help liking him.  Slightly.  
  
  
  
Visits with the Hunters was always a trial, with Duncan wanting to stay up all hours talking with his parents, and Cassie wanting to get up at 5 in the morning even thought it wouldn’t be light for hours.  Fran had stopped enjoying any holidays the year Cassie was born, in part because there was such pressure to Make Them Happy For The Kids, even when all you wanted to do as a single mother (and she had been a single mother, even when she and Duncan had still been together) was scream.  Or break down into a sobbing mess.  Last year might have been the worst of all because she and Cass had gone up to Lerwick while Jimmy visited his parents by himself.  Traveling with a hyperactive 4-year-old was too much to do alone, especially when she was just getting used to not having to do it alone back home.  Jimmy also wanted her to meet his family.  He didn’t say so, always gentle and careful to her, but Jimmy’s silences had been an open book since the first time she’d sat down next to him at the Rose and Crown and talked about how much she hated White Nights.  That was Jimmy’s way: he made space around him, and if you wanted, that space could be for you.  Fran had never found a space that fitted her so well, and she doubted she could if she searched for the rest of time.  
  
Cassie, predictably, passed out at 9:30 after running around the house non-stop for an hour before.  As soon as Cassie began to droop, Fran grabbed at the excuse to escape the excruciatingly awkward party.  Cassie ought to have been in bed the hour before, but Meave and Charlie always seemed to have half of Lerwick over all the season, and everyone liked to pet and make much of the little girl.  Jimmy was at her side as soon as she started gathering Cassie into her arms, quietly there for whatever she needed.  “I’m fine,” Fran said, smiling at him.  “She’ll pass right out, and I probably will too.”  
  
Jimmy nodded.  “Do you want me to come up anyway?” he asked.  Fran gathered that he wasn’t enjoying this any more than she was, which wasn’t exactly a surprise.  Jimmy was never one for big parties, preferring a quiet pint and someone else to do the talking.  
  
Duncan caught them at the bottom of the stairs, whiskey in one hand and an affable smile on his face.  “Don’t go up so early, both of you!  The night’s still young!”  
  
Jimmy glanced up the stairs, then turned to reply to Duncan.  Fran gratefully slipped away, tucking a semi-somnolent Cassie into bed, then getting herself ready.  Jimmy ducked his head around the bathroom door as she was brushing her teeth, and the corners of his mouth turned up in the kind of unintentional smile wedding dresses and expensive makeup were supposed to be required to inspire.  Looking at her reflection in ratty sweatpants and a uni shirt, mouth full of toothpaste, Fran could see her eyes go all googly back.  It was ridiculous to be this fond of someone after a year and a half of dating.  By this point, she and Duncan had been fighting pretty much nightly.  Fran spit and asked, “All good?”  
  
Jimmy nodded.  
  
“What do you think of Duncan?” Fran couldn’t help pushing.  
  
Jimmy grinned at her.  “You know I hate him.  He doesnae have any sense of responsibility, after all.”  Fran came over to him, fitting herself against his side comfortably.  Jimmy wrapped his arms around her and dropped a kiss on her hair.  “It’s a pity we have to deal with all the madness, of course, but we would never deny Cassie all the ceilidhean her heart desires, now would we?”  
  
Fran laughed, hugging Jimmy’s solidness tighter.  It was like he had wrapped her and Cassie in his solid, reliable policeman’s trustworthy bubble and nothing could shake them from it.  Fran began to think she just might survive the migraine without a migraine.  
  
  
  
Cassie had gotten big enough Duncan had trouble carrying her when she started squirming too much, so he was letting her run around the front yard while Fran and the new boyfriend sat inside and drank tea.  Duncan smiled at Cassie, loving the way her laughter rang across the yard.  He couldn’t imagine being her father the way Fran had wanted him to be, a backup Mam, always there with the protective instincts and the instant expertise in changing diapers and the perfect knowledge of when Fran would be mad about bribing her into being good and when it was fine.  Fran seemed to have totally given up on him with the advent of the new boyfriend, and Duncan couldn’t find it in himself to really be sorry.  Fran was pretty and fun and charming, but she was clingy and as soon as she’d gotten pregnant she'd gone all horrifyingly traditional.  Her Glasgow copper was clearly the strong and solid type, apparently what she was really looking for.  Duncan rolled his eyes that inconsistencies of women, who always said they wanted something and then married the exact opposite.  Watching the boyfriend smooth Fran’s forehead with his thumb and Fran smile gently up at him, Duncan figured there were definitely wedding bells in the future.  Well, if Fran wanted a lot of no fun in the filthy mess that was the Lowlands rather than a wild ride up at the top of the world, he wouldn’t stand in her way.  
  
“Duncan!  Look at the Mirry Dancers!” Cassie shouted, waiving at the Northern Lights above her round face as she ran to the porch, pleased as if Duncan had ordered them especially for her.  
  
“Aye, they’re lovely,” Duncan smiled down at her, unable to not stoop and kiss her red nose.  His girl had the brightest eyes on the island, he was pretty sure, and he looked forward to her growing up to be an even bigger heartbreaker than he was.  “Is it your Gran who’s been teaching you auld Shetland, then?”  
  
“I heard Jimmy telling Mum.  It sounds so much more magical than the other word I don’t remember.”  
  
“Jimmy, eh?”  
  
“Uh huh.  He talks funny sometimes, but Mummy says my new Granny and Grandad will be the same so's I'm trying to practice.”  
  
“I’m sure they’ll like you, princess.  No one could possibly not like you,” Duncan said, almost automatically, turning as the door opened.  
  
Fran stepped onto the porch, ignoring Duncan in as she said to Cassie, “Sweetheart, want to come in and help pack for tomorrow?”  
  
Cassie made a face.  “No!  I want to stay outside!”  
  
“Come on, Cassie, we have to start early tomorrow.”  
  
“NO!” Cassie’s face screwed up horribly and she took a deep breath that Duncan was sure would precipitate a horrifying wail.  
  
“It’s fine, we can stay outside a little longer,” he said quickly, to forestall the massive scene, and received a poisonous look from Fran.  Duncan put hands up to ward it off, muttering, “Or not,” quickly.  
  
Cassie, who had been temporarily distracted from her misery, realized Mum had apparently refused continued playtime, hiccuped and began to cry theatrically.  Fran sighed and glared at Duncan again, as if it was somehow his fault that Cassie would rather play outside with him than be made to do chores with Fran.  Before she could say anything, however, the boyfriend came outside, saw Cassie crying, and promptly scooped her up, burying her snotty nose in his shoulder and murmuring, “Aye, now it’s terrible but I thought you were excited about the boat, eh?  And gulls and waves and maybe the Mirry Dancers will still be out for you.  It’ll be a boat like your Christmas boat but big enough to stand on and we’ll be on there for almost three whole hours.”  
  
Duncan watched in mild astonishment as Cassie’s head came up, tears miraculously gone.  She scrubbed her hand over her face rubbing it on Jimmy’s shoulder again and began excitedly asking questions about the boat, Duncan’s sunny little princess again.  
  
“Aye, then, shall we go make sure everything in your backpack is put in the right way for a boat ride?  After all, we wouldn’t want anything to get wet, would we?” Jimmy asked, and got an enthusiastic response.  
  
Still carrying Cassie, Jimmy turned to go inside.  As he passed her, Fran reached out and touched his shoulder, and they exchanged a quick smile around Cassie.  
  
“So do you only date Shetlanders now, even though you’re too good to live here?” Duncan asked as the door closed behind Cassie and Jimmy.  
  
Fran stiffened.  “Unlike some Shetlanders, Jimmy’s capable of talking about other things than his own dunghill,” she snapped.  
  
Duncan shrugged, leaning against the railings.  “It’s a fine place, and I see no reason to leave it to pay Glasgow rent for a cockroach-infested closet.”  
  
“That’s because you’re incapable of putting yourself out for another person, Duncan.”  
  
Duncan shrugged.  It had always been Fran’s way to claim that he was selfish, even as she demanded that he change everything about himself, everything it might be supposed she’d fallen for in the first place.  
  
“Where’s he from, then?  Perez isn’t a very Shetland name.”  
  
“Fair Isle,” Fran said.  “He says there’s some family story about a Spanish grandmother or some such coming from a shipwreck.”  
  
“Ah,” Duncan said.  His mother would know the Perez family history, then.  Fran was still frowning, though at her gloved hands clutching the porch railing rather than at him.  “What is it, Fran?”  
  
She gave a quick sigh.  “It’s nothing.”  
  
“It is something,” Duncan said.  “You can hate me all you want, you know, but I can still tell when you’re fashed.”  
  
Fran pushed her lips together and said shortly, “It’s stupid.  I’m worried Jimmy’s parents won’t like me.”  
  
“First time meeting them?” Duncan said in surprise.  “I’m sure it’ll be fine; you’re the sort of girl parents like.”  
  
“Not yours,” Fran observed.  Duncan winced.  His mother thought no one was good enough for him.  
  
“You and Jimmy and Cassie are a better family than pretty much any one I’ve ever seen,” Duncan said.  “His parents will love you because he does.”  
  
Fran looked up at him, startled.  He rolled his eyes.  “It’s completely obvious.  Hasn’t he said?  I feel like I should be worried if he’s that laggardly to not say anything yet, Frannie.”  
  
She made a face at the name.  “Ugh, stop.  I was just surprised you’d noticed.  He’s quiet.”  
  
Duncan sighed.  “I’m not completely unobservant.  I just don’t always act on what I observe.  Like you said, selfish.”  He grinned at her.  “I’m glad you’ve found someone who makes you happy, Fran.”  He was, mostly.  Although Duncan couldn’t really imagine himself ever warming to Jimmy himself, the island man Fran liked better than Duncan Hunter.  It seemed unlikely they'd have to talk much aside from the few weeks a year Cassie came to visit, though.

 

**Imbolc, 2011**  
  
Cassie’s fourteenth birthday blew in with the bleak sleet of an especially dour Glaswegian February.  She didn’t throw Duncan’s present across the room but she didn’t open it, either.  Duncan tried to buy her things to make up for how he wasn’t THERE and right now, this year, Cassie was having none of it.  Mum wasn’t going to there at all any more and she barely had space in the disaster of her life for the family who were actually here in Glasgow.  If Duncan had really loved her, if he’d really loved Mum, he wouldn’t be sending her gifts, he’d be here, in Glasgow, and he would have been for the past three years while Mum was dying.  
  
There was a tap on her door, and then nothing.  Dad, then.  There hadn’t been a present from him at tea, and she half-expected that he might have forgotten her birthday in his haze of misery and working too much.  Maybe he’d guessed he wouldn’t be home for tea and wanted to save it to give it to her himself.  Sliding off her bed, Cassie opened the door.  It was Dad, with two cups of tea and a serious expression.  
  
Taking one of the cups of tea, Cassie settled onto her bed, feeling wary.  Even for Dad, this was a new level of serious.  She wondered what he’d found to be so serious about a birthday and hoped it wasn’t going to be a horrific repeat of the time he’d tried to talk about periods to her because Mum had been in chemo and he wanted to make sure she wasn’t scared.  
  
Dad sat at the desk chair and sipped his tea.  “Well?” Cassie asked.  
  
“So I’ve got an idea for your birthday present,” Dad said, “But I want to make sure you like it.  And if it’s not something you’ll want, we’ll go up to the West End and you can choose whatever hideous outfit you like as a better present and we’ll tell your grandparents I’m a terrible father and forget your birthday, aye?”  He smiled at her, the small curl of lips that was Jimmy Perez’s secret happiness that you had to pay attention to notice.  Cassie grinned back, so so grateful that whatever he was thinking, it was serious, but not sad.  Too many things had been sad this year; Cassie didn’t think she couldn’t take any more.  
  
Dad ran his hand over the beautiful model boat he’d got her for Christmas when she was five, still holding the place of pride on her desk.  “I was thinking you might like a real boat,” Dad said, and Cassie didn’t even know what to think.  “There’s a place for me in the force up in Lerwick, where I’d be able to get off early enough to pick you up from school.  We could get a little house, big enough for the two of us.  I thought it would be nice to have something to look at, some sky and sea, rather than the endless people who aren’t Fran, and you could have your boat.”  
  
Cassie gaped at him.  “You mean, like, move to Shetland?  For real?”  
  
“Mmmm.  I was thinking in the spring, after your exams,” Dad said.  “If it was what you wanted.”  
  
“What will Gran and Grandad think?”  
  
“I don’t suppose they’ll like it,” Dad said, with a quiet shrug.  “I think they’d like to keep you close if they could.  But it seems it’s your decision, more than theirs.”  
  
Cassie stared at him for a moment longer then swallowed.  “What about you?  Do you want to move to Shetland?”  
  
Dad ran his finger around the rim of his cup.  “I’ve always wanted to go back to Shetland.  It’s a fine place to live.  Folks are decent, and you can walk from Lerwick up to the crofts or along the beach when you want to get away.  The sun comes clear from the sky without being cut off by smog and on a clear day you can see all the way to Norway.”  
  
“So why are we still in Glasgow?”  
  
“Well, Fran was here.  And you.  And your school and your friends and your life.” Dad looked at his cup, as if he expected it to no longer be empty.  
  
“I don’t... know,” Cassie whispered.  It was terrifying to know that this was a decision Dad wanted her to make.  
  
Dad nodded, as if this were a real answer.  “Think on it, aye?  And let me know when you decide if I’m to take you shopping instead.”  
  
Standing he collected her empty tea mug, and gave her a one-armed hug.  “I love you, Cass.  You’re the best daughter a man could wish for.”  And Cassie was suddenly blinking back tears, again, for the third time that day, because it was astonishing that there was still so much love in a world that didn’t have Mum in it.  
  
“Love you too, Dad.”  
  
  
  
It was almost midnight when she finally called Duncan.  Mum and Dad would have been livid about calling someone so late, but she knew Duncan was night owl like her, and besides, she wanted to inconvenience him in any way she could.  “Cassie?” the voice on the other end of the phone was surprised, probably since she’d only talked to him when Dad had actually handed her the phone and told her to for over a year now.  
  
“Hi, Duncan.”  
  
“Did you like your present?”  
  
“I don’t know; I didn’t open it.”  Cassie stared at her ceiling, glow-in-the-dark stars forming half-constellations where their sticky backing hadn’t yet given in to gravity.  “Dad wants to move up to Shetland, did you know?”  
  
There was a pause on the other end of the phone, then Duncan said, “Yes, he asked if I knew if there’d be work.”  
  
“What do you think of it?” Cassie felt brutal, and short, and like she didn’t want to have to care about anyone else’s emotions.  Duncan hadn’t loved Mum in thirteen years, and she didn’t have to worry about HIS broken heart.  
  
“Well, I think it would be good,” Duncan said, and she could just hear the careless smile in his voice.  “I’d like to see you more than every once in a while -“  
  
“No you don’t,” Cassie said.  “If you really wanted to see me, you’d come visit more often, rather than waiting for us to visit you.”  
  
Duncan sighed.  “I would like to have you in Shetland, Cassie.  And Jimmy said he’s worried about his workload — I think even if you couldn’t stand to see me, it would be good for both of you if he had a less demanding job.”  
  
“He says he’ll get me a boat,” Cassie said, apropos of nothing.  
  
“Hey now, I thought it was my job to bribe you with inappropriate gifts to get your attention,” Duncan said, and Cassie found herself giggling before she could help it.  
  
“It wasn’t a bribe, Duncan,” Cassie said.  “I don’t know.  Everything is SO SAD.”  
  
Duncan was quiet for a moment, unusual for him.  “I don’t know if you and Jimmy will be less sad anywhere else, princess,” he said finally.  “But I can’t be near as sad in Shetland as I can anywhere else.  There’s something about the wind off the ocean that seems to blow it away.”  
  
“You sound like Dad.  And don’t call me princess,” Cassie added as an afterthought.  
  
“Jimmy’s an islander at heart.  He loved your Mum more, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love Shetland.”  
  
“Ugh, stop talking about a stupid place like it’s a person,” Cassie snapped, sitting up and glaring out the window.  It was still sleeting.  “What about me?”  
  
“Well, what about you?” Duncan asked.  “You asked about me and then you talked about Jimmy — what do you want?”  
  
Cassie flopped back against her pillows.  “I don’t know.  I want to be happy again, and I want to grow up, except not because EVERYONE grown up is miserable, and I want my friends to stop being awkward every time they talk about their Mums, and I want to pretend it never happened, and I never want to smile again.  And I never, ever want to go to a hospital.”  
  
“Well, I’m afraid Lerwick isn’t so remote we don’t have a hospital,” Duncan said, cautiously teasing.  
  
“Ugh, you’re useless,” Cassie said, grumpy.  
  
“Look,” Duncan said.  “You called me, which means you want useless advice.  If you wanted a serious conversation, you’d be talking to Jimmy and you know it.”  
  
“I hate you.”  
  
“Yup, got it.  So what do you want?”  
  
Cassie stared the plastic stars some more and thought about Up Helly Aa with her Hunter grandparents as a child, and ceilidhs on Fair Isle, and Dad starting to teach her to sail the summer before Mum got sick.  Then she thought about Izzy and Sarah and the plans they were already making for the summer and the fact that Barney would never look at her if she wasn’t even there.  And then she thought about asking Dad if she could go to a party last week, and the fact he hadn’t even asked who she was going with, he’s just looked dead-eyed and miserable as he nodded permission.  “I’ll let you know when I figure it out,” Cassie said, and hung up on him.

  
  
The next night, Cassie waited for Dad on the stairs.  He finally got in around nine, and she frowned at him horribly.  He looked like he was about to fall over.  “Oh my god, Dad, are you trying to work yourself to death?” Cassie muttered, dragging him into the kitchen and shoving the tea Gran had set aside in front of him rather than immediately ambushing him as she had planned.  
  
“I did get something at the station, Cassie,” Dad said, a bit bemused.  “I’m not starving.”  
  
“You look like death warmed over,” Cassie said shortly.  “We should move to Shetland.”  
  
Dad blinked at her.  “Are you sure?”  
  
Cassie glared.  “You asked me to decide.  This is me deciding.  We’re both miserable and I don’t want you to die too.”  
  
“Cassie,” Dad breathed, turning in his chair to pull her on to her lap like she was five again.  She buried her face in his shoulder because she was crying AGAIN and being treated like she was five sometimes made her act like it.  “I won’t die, I promise.  I promise, darling.”  
  
“You can’t promise,” Cassie muttered to his jacket.  “Mum didn’t WANT to die.  She would be alive for us if she could be.”  
  
Dad just hugged her, comfortable and solid and reliable and quiet.  It was raining in Glasgow, dark and miserable and cold and lonely.  Cassie thought about summers in Shetland, with endless sun and wind and fishing with her grandparents.  They hadn’t been up since Mum got sick.  
  
“I’m scared of going to Shetland and finding it’s just as awful as here,” Cassie said to Dad’s shoulder.  
  
He was still for a few moments longer, then said quietly, “It might be.  I can’t imagine anything worse than the last few months.  But I admit I’m having trouble imagining it being better anywhere, but Shetland — I feel like Shetland will give us more space for heartbreak, maybe.”  
  
“Yeah,” Cassie said, rubbing her eyes dry again.  “Tell me about the boat, then, Dad.”

 

**Beltane, 2012**  
  
“Ugh, why do parents suuuuuuuck?” Cassie flopped back against the rock, watching a puffin fumble above her head to land in the cliffs somewhere.  
  
“Because they do,” Angus said, rolling his eyes.  “At least Uncle Jimmy is pretty cool.”  
  
“No, he’s totally lame.  Duncan is cool, but also useless, so, like, whatever.”  
  
“Seriously, compared to my parents, Jimmy is so cool.  They think I shouldn’t want anything else in the world except to stay on Fair Isle forever.”  Angus flopped back next to her.  “Is it really such a big deal to at least want to go to uni in a real city with, like, high speed Internet?”  
  
Cassie laughed.  “I was definitely mad about the lack of civilization when we first moved to Lerwick and I realized cell service ended at the city limits.”  
  
“A-fucking-men.”  They stared at the clouds for a while longer, summer wind blowing salt smell across the North coast of the island.  
  
“I just —“ Angus started hesitantly, then paused.  Cassie made an encouraging noise.  Angus had been quieter than usual this visit, and twice now she felt like he was waiting for time to start a conversation he didn’t seem sure he wanted to have.  “It would be nice, some time, to be sure you could try something without EVERYONE knowing.”  
  
Cassie snorted.  “Do you know how much CCTV there is in Lerwick?  We can’t do ANYTHING without Dad knowing.”  
  
Angus laughed back thinly.  “All the more reason to go to a real city then.”  
  
“What is it you want to try?”  
  
“Cassie I think I’m gay,” Angus said quickly, all in a rush.  
  
“Oh.  Okay.”  Cassie blinked at the clouds and wondered if she’d always known, since she didn’t really feel that surprised.  “Is there someone you like then?”  
  
Angus let out his breath in a half-laughed explosion.  “Well that was underwhelming.  First time I come out, and all I get is ‘okay’.”  
  
Cassie rolled onto her elbow.  “Ugh, fine, I’m honoured you told me; of course I still love you, Angus, duh.  Now tell me about him!”  
  
“How do you know I like someone?”  Angus rolled up onto his elbow facing her.  
  
“Why else would you have brought it up?” Cassie asked.  “So?”  
  
Angus plucked a stem of grass and fiddled with it.  “You know Joe?  The bird researcher’s son?”  
  
“Oh, he’s cute!” Cassie approved.  Not her type, but definitely cute.  
  
Angus looked up at her again with the shyest smile.  Cassie felt a bit of regret on behalf of her gender, since Angus (while too much like a cousin for her to be into) was DEFINITELY cute.  “Yeah.  And I’ve never been able to talk to anyone like I can with him.”  
  
“Yeah?” Cassie encouraged.  
  
“Mmmmm.  And — he kissed me after the Ceilidh in spring.”  
  
“Get out!  Was it good?”  
  
Angus nodded, flicking a stone into the ocean and grinning shyly at his fingers.  “So, that’s kind of a thing?  I guess.  You’re really chill about this, you know.  How are you so chill about this?”  
  
“What, like I wouldn’t be?  I’m not a total bigot.  Also, I’ve had two Dads for most of high school.  Non-traditional families."  Cassie shrugged.  
  
Angus gave another burst of a laugh.  “You know I’ve never met your father.  Your real father I mean.  Duncan?”  
  
Cassie giggled.  “My father.  My biological father, if you want to get specific but that sounds ridiculous.  Jimmy’s just Dad, and I call Duncan Duncan.”  
  
“They’re not, like, actually together, though, are they?”  
  
Cassie flopped over in a fit of giggles.  “Definitely, no.  I’m telling Duncan you said that, though; he’ll find it hilarious.”  
  
Angus stopped laughing in a hurry and grabbed Cassie’s arm.  “No, you can’t tell anyone!”  
  
Sobering in response to the fear in Angus’s voice, Cassie sat up.  “Of course not if you don’t want me to.  But why not?”  
  
Angus sat up, too, staring at his feet.  “I can’t tell Mum and Dad yet.  They’re very — they expect me to be just like them, you know?  Just like everyone on Fair Isle.  And no one on Fair Isle is gay.”  
  
“You know Dad wouldn’t mind, right?” Cassie asked carefully.  “I mean, he’d be awkward as hell, but he wouldn’t be mad or disappointed or anything.”  
  
Angus tried to smile at her.  “I know.  Uncle Jimmy — he just, like, takes things as they are?  I feel like I could say anything to him, and he’d just slot it into the world and carry on, totally unshocked.  If I told him I killed someone, he’s just nod and tell me what forms to fill out to turn myself in and find me a therapist or something.”  
  
Cassie nodded.  “It’s great, until you’re mad at him, and then you wish he’d lose his temper like a normal person.”  
  
“Heh.  So yeah, I could say, but he’d hate me not telling Dad, and I really just can’t.”  
  
Cassie thought about Uncle Donnie and his dour Methodist church and nodded in acknowledgement.  “Is Joe okay with still being in the closet?”  
  
“He doesn’t — we haven’t really talked about it?”

"Well what do you talk about then?"

"I dunno."  Angus picked at the moss.  "The world, I guess?  Joe's always reading something and wanting to tell someone about it, and his parents don't listen, any more than mine do about computers.  It's just -- easy, somehow?  We'll go for a ramble on the cliffs, and everything feels easier."

 

**Lughnasadh, 2013**  
  
“Duncan!  Mary!”  
  
Duncan emerged from the kitchen wiping his hands on a towel, with a smile just for her.  “Hiya, Cassie!”  
  
Cassie dropped her bag and came to give him a hug and got a kiss on her cheek.  “Where’s Mary?”  
  
“Oh, she’s over at her Mam’s this week,” Duncan said lightly.  “Just the two of us to catch up.  So what news do you have?”  
  
“Sally and Kate bought tickets for Fringe.  I can go, right?  You know all the girls are going.”  
  
“Just the girls?  I feel like the last time I saw your crowd of friends a few lovesick boys were following you around.”  
  
Duncan sounded quite proud of her, but Cassie snorted.  “I’m not dating anyone from school, Duncan.  They’re all dire.”  
  
“Nothing wrong with stringing them along a little, then, eh?”  
  
Cassie giggled.  “Duncan, you’re awful.”  
  
Duncan shrugged, and pulled lasagna from the oven.  “Set the table, will you, love?”  
  
“So,” Cassie said, when they were seated comfortably and working their way through dinner.  “What’s happening in Lerwick?”  
  
“Shelley's leaving her husband to run off with a Norwegian from the rig, Bill's car lot is going under, and the environmental lunatics are protesting humans being in the way of birds again.  More than that, Jimmy almost certainly knows better than I do.”  Duncan said with a twinkle.  “I only get my information from the poker games and the pubs and my friends, you know.”  
  
Cassie threw her napkin at him.  “Well, then you’re better than Dad.  He doesn’t go to any of those, and he doesn’t have friends.”  
  
Duncan laughed.  “Jimmy knows plenty of people.”  
  
“Sure, he knows them.  Doesn’t mean he’s friends with them,” Cassie muttered.  
  
“All right, then.  What are you and Jimmy fighting about?” Duncan asked, mildly surprised that they had apparently now reached a point where Cassie felt comfortable letting him between her and Jimmy.  
  
“Ugh, he’s just crazy,” Cassie said, pushing a noodle around her plate.  “He doesn’t want me to do anything, like, ever.  I’m not a little girl any more.”  
  
“So you aren’t,” Duncan agreed.  “But you know Jimmy worries about everyone, Cassie.”  
  
“I know he’s paranoid.  Like, we have a whole planned thing for if someone breaks into the house.  For Lerwick, Duncan.”  Cassie rolled her eyes extravagantly.  “But he’s brought me up to be paranoid.  It’s not like I’m going to do something thoughtless and stupid just as soon as his back is turned.”  
  
“No, I suppose not, but Jimmy’s probably not thinking that clearly about it, you know.  He loves you very much, you know.”  
  
“Oh, I know.  I just wish he’d trust me, too.”  
  
  
  
“Duncan?” Cassie hovered on the steps down from her room.  Duncan looked up from his phone and put it aside, opening the afghan for her to come curl up beside him on the couch.  
  
“What is it, love?”  
  
“You know how I’m going to apply to uni down South?”  
  
“Aye.  I thought you were excited about it?”  
  
“I am!  I can’t wait, really.  But I’m worried about Dad.”  Cassie started plaiting the fringe of the blanket.  “He’s encouraging me to apply to really good schools.  But I don’t think he’s really thought it through.”  
  
“How do you mean?” Duncan asked, not really sure where this conversation was going.  
  
“Well, if I get into St Andrew’s or Glasgow, I’ll be away, like, all the time.  And you know how Dad gets when there’s no one around.  I’m afraid he’ll be living on take-out and not sleeping and have a heart attack or something awful.”  Duncan thought of Jimmy, and realized how horribly possible this vision was.  For at least a year after Fran’s death, Duncan was pretty sure the only time he’d seen Jimmy smile was at Cassie.  “And I guess I wonder if I ought to really go, then?” Cassie continued.  “I really want to — I want to meet all sorts of new people and to get to choose my classes and everything — but not if Dad’ll be so unhappy.”  
  
“If you want to go, you should go,” Duncan said immediately.  “I know what you mean, about Jimmy, but, love… you have to live your life for what you want.  You can’t be bending it out of shape for someone else.  He loved your mother very much, and of course he adores you, but that doesn’t make you responsible for his happiness.”  
  
“No,” said Cassie, sounding unconvinced.  “But on the other hand, it’s a good thing to do things for people you care about, even if you don’t necessarily want to do them.  Dad followed Mum to Glasgow without a second thought, and he hated Glasgow.”  
  
Duncan tried not to take this as a judgment on himself, who had not loved Fran enough to follow her South.  “But you can’t dedicate your life to trying to bring a smile to Jimmy’s rather dour countenance, Cassie.  For one thing, he’d hate to think you were holding yourself back for his sake.  He’s proud that you have the marks to get in, you know.”  
  
“I guess.  I don’t want him to not want me to go when he’s always talked about it, but I don’t want to be trying to enjoy uni and always be thinking about how he’s working the night through.”  
  
“Aye, I see that.  Shall I promise to cut his power at 9PM every night, then?”  
  
Cassie laughed.  “You’ll look after him when I go, won’t you, Duncan?”  
  
“Me?”  
  
“He likes you.”  
  
“He does not, Cassie.  He tolerates my existence because he thinks it’s better for you to have me in your life.”  
  
Cassie stuck her tongue out at him.  “Nah, he likes you.  He just disapproves of you not taking things seriously.”  
  
“Well, he takes things far too seriously, so I’m just as glad he thinks so,” Duncan said firmly.  “But yes, princess, I will try and ensure that your Dad doesn’t work himself to death, okay?”  
  
“You do like him, too, don’t you?” Cassie asked, as if she’d never thought of it before.  
  
“Of course I do.  I like everybody.”  He tweaked her nose.  
  
“Well, yeah, but…”  
  
Duncan sighed, and let himself be serious.  “Yes, princess, I like Jimmy and have never regretting telling him to move into the old Henry place.  He’s a good friend to me, too, even if we don’t always see eye to eye, and the best father you could have.”  
  
“You’re not half bad, yourself.”

 

**Up Helly Aa, 2018**  
  
“Hey, Jimmy!  Hurry up or we’ll be late!”  Duncan stuck his head into the station.  
  
“Go ahead, sir, I’ll finish up that report,” Sandy said immediately.  “Go on, then.”  
  
“Thanks,” Jimmy said, allowing Duncan to pull him out to the car.  
  
The Lerwick airport crowded with tourists, two days before Up Helly Aa.  Duncan was first to catch sight of Cassie, in her familiar dark peacoat and a new purple hat with a pompom, and waved frantically.  “Duncan!” Cassie exclaimed, running through the crowd to hug him tightly then instantly letting go at the sight of Jimmy, and throwing herself at him, too.  “Dad!”  Jimmy closed his arms around his girl, and held on, ignoring the frivolous pompom in his nose.  Cassie eventually pulled back, smiling at them so hard it looked like it should hurt her face.  “Oh, I’m so glad to see you both!  I have so much to tell you!”  
  
Before Cassie had even properly gotten started, talking about their new apartment and her visit to her grandparents in Glasgow all mixed up, Edison emerged from the crowd with their luggage, looping an arm around Cassie’s waist lightly to let her know he was there.  She turned and kissed him briefly in thanks, flushing a trifle as if she had only just remembered she was back in Scotland.  Duncan shook his head at her, unable to resist smiling.  She was still their Cassie, but he’d never seen her look as sure and happy as she did then.  Indeed, he’d never seen her look so like Fran.  
  
Jimmy, being Jimmy, had already collected two of the bags from Edison and was smoothly navigating them out of the airport without having turned his attention from Cassie.  Watching the equally smooth transition to getting the boot packed, Duncan laughed suddenly, remembering the first time he’d watched Jimmy organize people without saying a word.  Cassie made an inquiring noise, and Duncan explained, “The first time I met your Dad, he was expertly squiring you and your Mum through what must have been a horrifically stressful meet-the-family kind of trip, and I was thinking he’s just as likely to make things be done his way now as he was then.  I imagine it was quite a comfort to Fran to have him about, especially when you got up your screaming tantrums.”  
  
“Excuse you, I was an angel,” Cassie said laughing, as Jimmy let his mouth quirk at them indulgently.  
  
“You were an unholy terror,” Duncan argued.  
  
“Dad, make Duncan stop!”  
  
“I don’t know what he’s on about,” Jimmy said.  “He always let you have whatever you wanted as soon as you looked the slightest bit sad.  You were only a brat when Fran and I made such unreasonable demands as to insist you not live on a diet entirely of sweets and not dive headfirst out of the ferry.”  
  
“Dad!”  
  
Duncan smiled at Edison as they climbed into the car, feeling that the lad deserved a bit of kindness, with Cassie totally ignoring him in favour of laughing with Jimmy.  Of course, the first thing Cassie wanted to do go down to look at her boat, no matter how unseasonable the weather.  Edison had the chilled look for Southern tourists tended to get when they hadn’t packed warm enough gloves, so Duncan invited him in and poked up the fire.  “Good flight?” Duncan asked him.  
  
“Yes, sir.”  
  
“Oh, don’t call me sir, lad, no one does and Cassie makes me feel plenty old without you helping.  How’s business going?”  
  
“Well!  We've been meeting with Daslu since the summer — they’ve seen the success we’ve been having with some of the import stores, and Cassie’s sitting down with The Tweed Shop on our way back through Glasgow to talk about their Islands line.  I think we should be able to work things out.”  Duncan remembered talking over their business plan, years ago in Glasgow, and thinking Edison had the charm, caution, and enthusiasm that might get him somewhere someday.  Duncan was glad he was right.  Like Cassie, Edison was clearly in his element, thrilled with his work and his chances, loving his life.  
  
“Tea?” Duncan asked, smiling as the lad moved closer to the fire, almost unintentionally.  
  
“Oh, I can make it!”  
  
“No, get warm.  You’re not ready for the Shetland winter, I can see that, lad.”  
  
Edison retreated to couch, shy smile on his face.  “I don’t know how Cassie deals with it.”  
  
“Aye, well, she was raised on Shetland.  It’s good to see you both going on so well.  We’re glad you could finally make it out for the holidays.”  
  
“I know Cassie has missed you and Mr. Perez the last couple years.”  
  
“You may as well call him Jimmy, lad.  He’s practically your father-in-law at this point.” Duncan said with a laugh.  Jimmy liked Edison well enough, if only for the smile he still brought to Cassie’s eyes.  
  
“I don’t want to offend him,” Edison said, accepting the cup of tea Duncan offered.  
  
Duncan laughed.  “You don’t offend him, lad.  He just takes some time to warm up to folks.”  
  
“He clearly loves Cassie very much.  Of course you do too —“  
  
Duncan waived aside the awkward backtracking, “But I didn’t try to glare you into submission on sight, I know.  And Cassie told you I was an easy touch.  Aye, she’s not wrong — Jimmy would be the first to tell you I’d be happy about anything that’d make her smile.”  
  
“Well, he did,” Edison said, with that shy grin again.  
  
Duncan laughed.  “So he did.  Not to worry.  He cares just as much for what makes Cassie smile as I do.  He’s better these days than when Cassie was growing up.  It helps that we haven’t had any murders on Shetland in a while, and they don’t get him down South for consulting very often.  He gets right dour when he’s on a murder case, but he can be quite pleasant when he’s fishing and the like.  Just keep making our girl smile, and you'll get through.”  
  
  
  
“Are you doing all right, Dad?” Cassie asked, as they looked over the new coat of paint Jimmy had put on the boat at the end of the season.  
  
“Oh, aye, of course I am.” Jimmy helped her down to the ground and they turned to walk back toward the house.  
  
“It’s just — you never talk about anyone in your life.  Sometimes Duncan says you’re seeing someone, but you never mention it, so I wondered if he was just saying that so I wouldn’t worry.”  
  
Jimmy smiled down at his girl.  “I will always love Fran, Cass, but I’m not still hung up on her.  I date, now and again, but nothing’s been right serious yet, so I didn’t see a reason to mention it.”  
  
“I wish you had someone,” Cassie said after a moment.  “I’m so happy, Dad, but I miss you in bits and pieces, and I can’t imagine what it would be like without Edison.”  
  
Jimmy hummed agreement, thinking about his surprising lack of despondency.  “I wouldn’t mind finding someone for me like Edison is for you, but I don’t see that my happiness depends on it, Cassie.  No one alive today will matter to me as much as you do, and even when you’re not here, it isn’t as if I haven’t got plenty of people to take care of.  Even aside from the bother of keeping Duncan out of trouble, those young hellions of Sandy’s are constantly underfoot.  The love of my life isn’t necessary for my happiness.”  
  
“You aren’t lonely?”  
  
“Oh, aye, now and again, but Duncan’s staying over often as not, when he and Mary have a tiff, and Angus comes up now and again with his boyfriend for the fishing, and of course I’ve work to keep me busy.”  
  
“Are Duncan and Mary —?”  
  
“You’ll have to ask to him, love,” Jimmy said.  “I can’t say I’ve ever understood them, really.  They’re at outs at present, but she’ll still be glad to see you if you’ve time to drop in.”  
  
Cassie sighed, fiddling with her gloves.  “Edison’s Dad hasn’t time for him, except at business meetings, and barely even then.  I don’t see how he turned out so nice, Dad.”  
  
“I guess some people come out okay, no matter what,” Jimmy said.  
  
“I guess.  I’m —“ Cassie took a deep breath, than said firmly, “I’m not going to be that kind of parent, though.  I don’t know I’ll be as good at it as you, but I’ll definitely try.”  
  
Jimmy stopped in his tracks, looking down at Cassie.  She stopped next to him, looking up anxiously, clearly teetering on the edge of anxious and excited.  He could see her like that, at five on her first day of school, at eight wanting to take the boat out on her own, at fourteen coming up to Shetland, at twenty telling him she was following a boy he’d just met to Brazil.  It was hard to think of her as a mother, even though she’d been living her own life and running her own business for going on three years now.  Nonetheless, Jimmy felt himself smiling helplessly at her, knowing how happy she would be with the child, hers and Edison’s.  “Well, then,” he said, hugging her around the shoulders.  “I’m sure you’ll be better.”  
  
She hugged him tightly around the waist, and whispered thickly, “I love you, Dad.”  
  
“Love you back,” he replied gently, kissing the ridiculous pompom on her hat.

  
  
When Cassie and Jimmy came in, with a swirl of gathering snow, Edison jumped up to greet Cassie as if they’d been out of each other’s company for a few days rather than a few minutes, an anxious question in his eyes.  Cassie hugged him tightly, muttering, “It’s okay,  querido.”  
  
Duncan raised his eyebrows at Jimmy, who was hanging up his and Cassie’s coats.  Jimmy shrugged, and gave him that particular Jimmy grin — like he didn’t want to ruin his good dour Scottish expression, but the happiness was breaking through.  Duncan didn’t get to see it as often as he’d like, but it was all the more warming for it’s rarity.  “Seems we’re going to be Grandads, Duncan.”


End file.
